Posted on November 17, 2017
I am guilty. Guilty of being inconsistent. Guilty of not being able to commit to a good habit. There are moments when I feel as if I’m just being drifted along the waves and motions of a busy corporate life that I just forget about everything else and I have no excuse. I know that. My husband knows that. God knows that.
And that’s the thing about God. He knows everything. He knows that He’s what’s best for us that when we forget about Him, He is bound to remind us and give us a nudge (or even a shove if needed) that He should always be a part of our lives. I got that nudge this evening when I was feeling a bit worrisome over the troubles of my loved ones.
When my husband and I got home after dropping my sister-in-law at their house, I decided to pick up and read the weekly devotional by Rica Peralejo-Bonifacio amongst the pile of mess that I have on my side of the bed. I haven’t been doing my devotions lately (like I said, I’ve no excuse) because I didn’t give the effort to make time for it. But tonight I was convicted to do something about my lack of discipline.
Interestingly, the first devotion for November was about having the posture to receive and being open to helplessness.
A lot of people near and dear to me are being stricken with illness over the past week. My brother for one, is in the hospital right now because of dengue fever, and it just pains me that I am on the other side of the world, unable to do anything. And thinking about it now in retrospective, I showed lack of faith in feeling helpless because that meant that I didn’t believe in the power of my own prayers.
But God! God nudged me! As if to say, “O ye of little faith!”, He put me in my place and gave me His Word.
Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!
Helplessness is something that our human minds tend to fret over. In worldly standards, we are expected to be self-sufficient or independent, not needing to ask other people for help and still be quite put-together. It’s something that even I get anxious about especially when I feel helpless over not being able to be there for the people I love or feeling as if I want to be able to do something more for them but I seem to be missing the mark or fall short of what I expect myself to be.
Sometimes it astounds me how much I have to keep reminding myself that it’s okay to not be put-together because anything that I lack, God makes it whole. That it’s okay to feel helpless because there is hope in Jesus Christ! Jesus took all our blemishes upon himself—past, present and future— so that we may be saved! Who was I to doubt that the Heavenly Father, who loves me so much, would hold out on blessing me and the people that I love most?
If you have faith and do not doubt, you will not only do what was done to the fig tree, but even if you say to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and cast into the sea,’ it will happen. All things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive.
Three main points highlighted in the devotional were humility, favor, and faith. Helplessness gives way for us to become humble in the midst of realizing that we are not perfect which then creates space for favor so that we would have the right posture to receive with the faith that God will bless all our needs so long as we acknowledge that everything comes from Him.
I pray that helplessness causes hope and joy in Christ to rise in us because he has taken it all for us! All the burden, all the sins, all our imperfections…Jesus Christ has made us perfect! Let the spirit of infirmity, depression, anxiety be replaced instead with love, joy, and peace in the name of Jesus! No weapon formed against us shall prevail. Thank You, Lord, for the overwhelming and reckless love that You have for us! Amen.
Posted on July 29, 2017
I like keeping journals and/or updating my social media with photos or quotes that fancy my whim. What’s interesting is that when I get back to these little snippets of my life, I’m often blown away whenever I come across something I never thought I’d post or write. Read More
Posted on January 19, 2017
Those closest to me would know that I have great reverence for Nanay Norma, my maternal grandmother. We shared the same room and she would be the one to wake me up for school and prepare my breakfast and some hot water for bath. We had a love-and-hate relationship, Nanay and I, but only because we both can be fretful and we end up arguing about it. But how I loved her! I remember my mother telling me once how when I was a baby, I’d wake up on a Saturday morning and after realizing my parents were the ones sleeping next to me, I’d rise from bed and run to the other room where Nanay was sleeping. She would also let me sleep beside her when I had a fever and would be the one to wake me up to drink my medicine in the middle of the night. Read More
Posted on June 9, 2016
A few hours after my previous post was made public, a friend who had read my blog sent me a text asking what led me to find Jesus despite all the feeling of inadequacy and crippling self-doubt that I am struggling with from time to time. I was intimidated by the fact that this was someone who didn’t believe in God and that I may not be able to explain or describe exactly how the change came about. Since I was caught off guard I explained that Jesus dying on the cross reminded me of God’s love and whenever I am reminded of how tremendous God’s love is by sending us his one and only son to pay for our sins, the void that I have in my heart gets filled. Read More
Posted on June 3, 2016
Not until a couple of months ago I was agnostic, and this isn’t something I usually say out loud. A lot of things just didn’t make sense to me and a huge part of my disbelief came from seeing other people who know their Bible verses, regularly go to church every Sunday, and proclaim God’s name whenever something good happens to them or whenever they try to ask for something but then these are the same people who are always so quick to judge and discriminate or do a lot of un-Christian things. I just couldn’t stand it and at the same time I didn’t want to end up like them. My resolve was to go on with my life, trudge on, and make my own destiny. I thought, Hey, I can go and pursue whatever I want as long as I don’t hurt anyone, right? Read More